5/8 Obama kills Yucca Mountain storage facility.  No coal.  No oil.  No Nukes.  How does this guy plan to power his teleprompters?

5/8 Obama cuts back on payments to widows and orphans of slain law enforcement officers.  “$300,000 each?!?  That’s almost as much as a joy ride in Air Force One!”

5/8 Stimulus package sent to Argentinian gay bars. Barack Obama: fiscal conservative.

5/8 White House aide fired for taking photo of Air Force One with New Jersey as background.

5/8 Paris Hilton googles herself, film not available.

5/8 539,000 people lost their job in April, 500 million jobs if you’re speaker Pelosi.

5/8 Barack Obama continues to strongly disagree with current administration policies.

5/8 Guess the Party, Council Bluffs, Nebraska edition, now with Craigslist rub & tug goodness.

5/8 Princess Michelle believes everyone should have taxpayer funded servants.

5/8 There’s a joke at the State Department.  No, not her, a different one.

5/8 Ted “Batshit Insane” Turner endorses forced abortions for population control.

5/8 WoManny Ramirez suspended for hormone use; plans to binge on Ben & Jerry ’s, have a good cry.

5/8 University of Illinois bans handshakes, mandates terrorist fist jabs at graduation.

5/8 Marks & Sparks will no longer milk large breasted women.