. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . Daily Danet Broken News Ticker  Quote of the Moment: "Governments tend not to solve problems, only to rearrange them." - Ronald Reagan  Click Here for More Broken News  Obama: Greedy doctors will amputate rather than treat! Greece: No treatment under public healthcare, amputation is cheaper.  Dems to political donors: Donating to the GOP? Enjoy your complimentary IRS audit and DOJ investigation.  Pop Quiz: Who Said It–Peter Griffin, Homer Simpson Or Joe Biden?  USA Today frets about fewer women in Congress if GOPpers like Sharron Angle and Christine O'Donnel defeat Harry Reid and Ted Kaufman.  Libloggers want IRS to issue itemized receipt. Bring it on, Lefty.  Come see the violence inherent in the system: Idiotic 10:10 video reveals Green anti-human bias.  Don't know much about history: Obama says it took time to free the slaves. Actually, it took the GOP.  Song most likely to make men cry is . . . are you kidding? First, real men don't listen to REM. Second, sure, if you mean "make it stop" crying.  Politics of Fear: Obama admin announces credible but not specific terror threat, 5 weeks ahead of election.  Obama on a mission from God; holds direct, talks with Jesus without preconditions.  Click Here for More Broken News  Quote of the Moment: "Conservatives have excellent credentials to speak about human rights. By our efforts, and with precious little help from self-styled liberals, we were largely responsible for securing liberty for a substantial share of the world's population and defending it for most of the rest." - Margaret Thatcher  Daily Danet is not suitable for bear attack.  . . . . . . . .

Broken News

Monday, October 11th

Obama: Greedy doctors will amputate rather than treat! Greece: No treatment under public healthcare, amputation is cheaper.
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Dems to political donors: Donating to the GOP?  Enjoy your complimentary IRS audit and DOJ investigation.
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Pop Quiz: Who Said It–Peter Griffin, Homer Simpson Or Joe Biden?
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Monday, October 4th

USA Today frets about fewer women in Congress if GOPpers like Sharron Angle and Christine O'Donnel defeat Harry Reid and Ted Kaufman.
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Libloggers want IRS to issue itemized receipt. Bring it on, Lefty.
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Saturday, October 2nd

Come see the violence inherent in the system: Idiotic 10:10 video reveals Green anti-human bias.
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Friday, October 1st

Don't know much about history: Obama says it took time to free the slaves.  Actually, it took the GOP.
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Wednesday, September 29th

Song most likely to make men cry is . . . are you kidding? First, real men don't listen to REM. Second, sure, if you mean "make it stop" crying.
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Politics of Fear: Obama admin announces credible but not specific terror threat, 5 weeks ahead of election.
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Obama on a mission from God; holds direct, talks with Jesus without preconditions.
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Tuesday, September 28th

47 Obstructionist Republicans now cleverly masquerading as Dems and opposing Obama on tax hike.
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Christiane Aman-poor Ratings.
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James Earl Obama: Malaise.
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Monday, September 27th

Two Congressional seats retire from New York, move to Florida, play bridge and eat dinner at 4:00
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Friday, September 24th

Reid literally mails it in at debate, scuffle breaks out between the 80% Angle supporters and 20% union members Reid supporters.
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Conservatives make less money, but give more to charities.
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Washington D.C. overridden by stinky, nasty, life sucking vermin. Also, there is some sort of insect problem.
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Thursday, September 23rd

From the Halls of Montezuma, to the Bever Park petting zoo, we will stone our nation's livestock...
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Obama brings his Hope & Change™ shtick to world despots; heavy on rhetoric, anemic on details.
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Loretta Sanchez: Don't let Vietnamese steal MY house seat.
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Political Jokes: Dems invite Stephen Colbert to testify, in character, on immigration. Next week, Santa Claus on welfare handouts.
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Wednesday, September 22nd

Models show scientific explanation for parting of Red Sea.
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Bob Woodward: McChrystal was right.
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Tuesday, September 21st

Don't know much about history: Obama claims Mexicans were here long before America was even an idea.
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Children of Alaska encouraged to Vote Murkowski.
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Unintended chickens coming home...to roost. Insurers drop child-only policies after Obama mandate. #tcot #tlot
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Reid backhand endorses O'Donnell, calls Gillibrand the hottest member of Senate. Mikulski suddenly chopped liver?
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Quantum Leap: Matthews, possessed by rationality, tells Obama that tax cuts are not government handouts.
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Top Ten Quotes from Biden’s European Trip

Wednesday, May 20, 2009
By Dan

Here are some quotes from Joe Biden’s trip to Europe. He was apparently followed around by a roaming band of crickets.

10.  “Ya know, as I wuz sayin’ to Sharkossy yesterday, France is a wonderful country. I’m so glad we saved your behind in the big one.  And hey, it takes a really smart country to elect such a short guy.” [Crickets]
9.  “Hey Queenie, thanks for having me here in Jolly Ole England. I love it here, I really do. I remember when my dad was a coal miner here.”
8.  “I wanna thank Prince Charles, and his lovely wife Princess Diana, she’s great, isn’t she?  Hasn’t changed a bit in twenty years.  Oh, God luv ya, what am I talkin’ about.”
7.  “Angela, by the way — she’s a real handsome woman, ain’t she? — Angela Merkel and I were just talking about how organized you folks are over here. I mean you need to show your papers to take a crap. I thought Hitler lost the war.” [Crickets].
6.  “Wow, I feel like an Armenian in a Turkish restaurant.” [Crickets].
5.  “And look at Turkey.  Here is the first mainstream Muslim nation that is articulate and advanced and a nice-looking place.  I mean, that’s a storybook, man.”
4.  “When you Germans invaded Czechoslovakia, Prime Minister Winston Churchill  went on TV and told people what was going on — that’s leadership.”
3.  “So I told Reagan, I sez, ‘Ronnie, if you keep doing what you’re doing in Afghanistan, in twenty years, we’re gonna have a problem with this bin Laden guy.’ And you know what he said, ‘Been who?’”
2.  “‘Sharkossy,’ I gotta tell ya, your wife is hot–I mean smokin’. Whoo-hoo.” This was met by polite, but awkward, applause from the audience at the French Women for Equality Rally. “Go ahead and stand up, show ‘em yer gams Carla–man if I was twenty years smarter…what a doll!”
1.   “Now president [looks at notes, mumbles] Yushchenko, I want you to know, Russian troops may come over that hill — heck they might be on their way right now — but Obama and I — we may make some mistakes, we might not seem like we know what we’re doing, but if your gird your loins, we’ll do some serious diplomacy before they have a chance to shoot you and your family in the public square.”

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