Clinton Pulls Out of New Hampshire
Friday, November 30th, 2007
Democratic presidential hopeful Hillary Clinton (D-Your State Here) announced a withdrawal of her campaign from New Hampshire. The announcement comes after a mentally ill Clinton supporter, Reade Undant, entered the office with a bomb strapped to his body and took hostages for several hours. In a statement to the media, Clinton spokesperson Howard Shetreatirak,... »
Tags: Clintons, iraq, Satire, terrorism
Posted in U.S. | No Comments »
CNN Pre-Clears Debate Questions
Thursday, November 29th, 2007
Following the November 28 debacle where CNN allowed most of the “audience” questions to come directly from Democratic operatives, CNN has announced a new policy of pre-clearing “audience” questions prior to the debates for both Republican and Democratic candidates. CNN has publicly expressed regret over the error, but maintains that the slanted, ideologically liberal questions... »
Tags: conservatives, funny, Healthcare, liberals, Media Bias, Satire
Posted in Healthcare, Media Bias, U.S. | No Comments »
Pelosi Suggests Iraq Compromise
Thursday, November 8th, 2007
Speaker of House Nancy Pelosi (D-Ranged) announced a proposal of compromise over the strategy in Iraq. For months, Democrats have tried to find middle ground between the wishes of their mouth-breathing, psychotic anti-American lunatic base and the appearance of being tough on terror. “This legislation,” notes Mrs. Pelosi, “seeks to extend our experience and work... »
Tags: Congress, Nancy Pelosi, Politics
Posted in Government, Military, U.S. | No Comments »
49 Against 1
Thursday, November 8th, 2007
In response to a suit filed by the State of California against the federal government over Global Warming™, the other 49 states have filed counter-claims against California. The unprecedented counter-suit claims that California, among other things, has mandate nationwide fuel efficiency and emissions requirements through their asinine do-gooder laws, and that these asinine do-gooder... »
Tags: Global Warming, individual rights, law, states rights
Posted in Fail, Global Warming™, Government, Politics, U.S. | No Comments »
IRS Email Hoax
Wednesday, November 7th, 2007
Clearly the Nigerian scam artists are feeling the pinch of a weak dollar. I received in my personal email inbox today an email claiming to be from [email protected]. There were several things that raised my radar about this email: It purported to be a letter from the government saying they owed me money. Let me say... »
Tags: Taxes, technology
Posted in Fail, Government, Opinion, Taxes | No Comments »
New Designs at the Newsstand
Tuesday, November 6th, 2007
I am, improbably, on jury duty for the next few weeks, so the posts will be even fewer and further between. I have had some time to update the Newsstand, however: Didn’t Ask, Wasn’t Told If it can work for the military, it can work for you! This one is for the guy or... »
Tags: Al Gore, Government, law, Military
Posted in Global Warming™, Government, Military, Personals, Taxes, U.S. | No Comments »
Governor Spitzer Announces New Crime Initiatives
Thursday, November 1st, 2007
Following the announcement of his plan to provide official New York drivers licenses to all illegal immigrants (the “Definitve Unified Multiple-Bureau ID Enforcement Act”), New York’s governor Eliot “Steamroller McThug” Spitzer (D-Mon) announced today a new crime initiative that will be effective state-wide on January 1, 2008. Critics have complained that the drivers license plan encourages... »
Tags: immigration, law, Politics, Satire
Posted in Fail, Government, Politics, U.S. | No Comments »
Schumer Declares End of “Reagan Era”
Thursday, November 1st, 2007
Senator Chuck Schumer (D-NY), in projecting large Democrat gains next November, gleefully noted that, “We’re about at the tail end of the Ronald Reagan era, where his ideas — fresh and, even as a Democrat, I’d say, many of them needed at the time — have just lost steam, lost resonance.” Senator Schumer, referring... »
Tags: Ayn Rand, Congress, fail, Reagan, Satire
Posted in Best Of, Government, Name Game, Taxes, U.S. | No Comments »