Top Secret Obama Policy on Iran Revealed
The Daily Danet has obtained the Obama administration’s Top Secret policy to deal with Iran’s continuing belligerence and apparent unending quest for a nuclear weapon. The strategy, which is set out in escalating stages in response to Iran’s continued defiance, is already at Obama Condition, or ObamaCon, 6 of 10:
- Remind the world that Hope is Stronger than Fear, and that Change is better than no Change.
- Remind Iran that Bush is no longer President, and that shrubs are no longer than trees.
- Give a speech in Cairo, blaming America for everything that has gone wrong in the world since 1776.
- Turn a blind eye to peaceful demonstrations against Iranian regime–a friend in need–amIright?
- Gently remind Iran of its international obligations.
- Send a sternly worded letter to Iran about its international obligations.
- No dessert for a week.
- No xbox until free and fair elections are restored/they stop refining uranium/release the hostages/stop calling me Barry.
- Warn Iran not to use the nuclear bombs it has built.
- Condolence calls to those outside the blast radii.