Broken News

Friday, August 26th

I'm off to solve our national debt problem.  Be back in 8,000 years.
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CERN discovers more evidence of sun-driven climate change. So much for Huntsman's established science.
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Thursday, August 25th

Huntsman calling Global Warming™ established science is like saying Detroit winning SuperBowl XLVI is "established history."
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Dick Cheney invites all of Washington on a quail hunt.
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Monday, August 22nd

Team Obama: We don't know that Rick Perry isn't a racist.
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Best reason yet to root for Perry: Trial lawyers hate him with the fire of a thousand suns.
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Obama on our non-hostile involvement in Libya: Days not weeks. 160 days, and counting.
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Sunday, August 21st

Rep. Maxine Waters invites Tea Party to her district.
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Saturday, August 20th

Captain Incompetent: You know what this country needs? More regulation to increase the cost of energy. Thanks Obama!
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Friday, August 19th

Afghanistan until Malia can run for Congress (2024): Long. Hard. Slog. 
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Good news: Obama would be a shoo-in for mayor of Martha's Vineyard.
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Obama to farmer: "Me? Regulate? Call the USDA, they'll set you straight." 2 days later, professional reporter is still getting the runaround.
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New Giants stadium now a dog house.  To have enormous yellow bird put on upper deck.
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Obama attacking Perry on jobs is like the Detroit Lions saying the GB Packers need a QB.
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Obama: We need to get Americans back to work.  Now watch this drive.
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Congress: When did you know about Fast and Furious? Holder: Pardon me?
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Thursday, August 18th

Under Obama, illegal immigration no longer illegal. Deportations halted, just like the economy.
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Coburn off his meds; end Medicare and back to paying with chicken and baked goods; claims Obama benefited as a black man from govt programs.
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Captain Pardon Me: Hey, S&P. Nice business ya got dere.  Be a pity if sumptin were to happen to it.
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American doctors always want to cut, cut, cut.  You wait four weeks, it will fall off by itself.
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Michael Vick shows he's the classy kind of guy Philly deserves. What next, dog killer?
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Janine Garofalo is a misogynistic hermaphrodite being paid by Planned Parenthood to espouse an anti-woman agenda.
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Dow down over 500. Maybe Obama will give another speech.
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Christine O’Donnell refuses to answer Piers Morgan’s questions. Maybe he should just hack into her voicemail to find answers.
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Wednesday, August 17th

Obama: What me, regulate? Dismisses farmer's concern.
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If Abercrombie & Fitch says you're too douchebag for them, you might be a grease neck.
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Union thug shoots company owner for not destroying his business by unionizing.
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Cuomo: 9/11 Anniversary should not be about the City of NY, it should be about ME!
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Hope·ocrisy: Netroots wants all voices heard, so it is banning conservatives from it conference city.

Thursday, June 23, 2011
By Dan

Hope·ocrisy: Netroots wants all voices heard, so it is banning conservatives from it conference city.

Tags: , , irony,

This entry was posted on Thursday, June 23rd, 2011 at 9:32 am and is filed under Broken News. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed.

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