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The Daily Danet
The Daily Danet (like “Planet,” but with a Dan instead of a Plan) is an online (sometimes) satirical newspaper published online by Daily Danet LLC, a New York limited liability company. The Editor in Chief (and sole author) of the Daily Danet is Dan Conlon.*
Most reports will be satirical in nature and will fall into one of the Daily Danet’s sections, such as Business, Science, U.S., etc. On occasion, the editors will receive reports with a byline from the past (or future). These will be filed under “Today in History.”
The Daily Danet website is composed of Broken News™ and original content. The original content consists of analysis, opinion and advice on all sorts of topics, with special focus on politics, Global Warming™ and, recently, healthcare (as well as health care). Broken News™ is a daily collection of funny, serious, smarmy or otherwise interesting links, as filtered through the Daily Danet Sieve of Knowledge™ (patent pending). Broken News can be view in the ticker, on the center side-bar, both of which provide the most recent posts, or on the Broken News category page. Clicking on the “Comment” link on the center side-bar will take you to the permalink where you can discuss the news item and see any embedded video without leaving the friendly confines of the Danet website.
The Sieve of Knowledge
All postings are processed through the Sieve of Knowledge. The Sieve of Knowledge is 1.7 kg bio-mechanical computing device developed and programmed by some of the world’s finest scientists, educators and legal scholars at Texas A&M University, The University at Stony Brook, The University of Arizona, St. John’s University School of Law, Brookhaven National Laboratories, Lawrence Livermore National Laboratories, NASA Langley Research Center and other fine institutions of science, research, higher learning and capitalism.
The Sieve of Knowledge was originally designed to run on a mix of carbonated high fructose corn syrup combined with partially hydrogenated vegetable shortening. Due to bio-mechanical aging and mass aggregation, the Sieve of Knowledge 2.0 runs on celery, carrots, whey protein and the best stuff on Earth with aspartame.
Dan received a Bachelor of Science in Physics from Stony Brook; a Masters of Science in Atmospheric Sciences from the University of Arizona and a Juris Doctor from St. John’s University School of Law. Dan has worked for NASA, the federal government, major corporations and two of the most prestigious law firms in the world, where he strove to keep America safe for billionaires. Dan currently works in a law department for an S&P 500 corporation in the financial services industry.
Dan’s politics are more conservative than liberal, and more libertarian than Republican. Dan is a mix of Ayn Rand’s views on the economy, Ronald Reagan’s foreign and military policy and Sam Kinison’s calm, rational demeanor.
Dan lives and works in New York with his lovely wife, Nina, and their beloved dog, Sedona Schnebly.
*Not his real surname, but a close facsimile.
To contact Dan, email him at: